Suffering and Happiness
The one feature that sets life on Earth apart from a paradise is suffering. It poses a problem for humanity and calls for a solution. This problem relates to human desires, the satisfaction of which is often difficult and uncertain, if not impossible, and always transient, in need of renewal; it is doomed to end sooner or later in death. One extreme way of solving this problem is to kill these desires by detaching oneself from their objects, while providing the body with minimum care, or to simply kill oneself. This detachment consists in regarding these objects as illusory or vain. It proceeds from a defeatism or a mysticism. In cases where life offers possibilities of fulfillment in the accomplishment of pleasurable activities and honorable duties, this detachment is premature or suspicious. Like suicide in such cases, it may indicate a morbid disposition, marked by laziness and cowardliness. The opposite of this extreme way is the foundation of modern civilization. It implies a stubborn attachment to the objects of one's desires, such as good health, pleasure, mutual love, and success. It also implies a stubborn effort to satisfy these desires. Now, this effort cannot be effective without a knowledge of the world, humanity included, or the workings thereof. It generates and ultimately meets the need for science, in the broadest sense of the word, and technology, which is the art of making the laws of nature serve human interests. Furthermore, it produces a feeling of dignity, notwithstanding the errors and the failures that are indicative of fallibility. This feeling belongs to people who go to great lengths to achieve their earthly purpose ? in a word, people who abide by this principle: Strive to thrive. It is unique to a courageous life, ever struggling against difficulties and changing, never boring. In comparison, a life of peaceful idleness or an afterlife of restful bliss (by definition as desireless, effortless, painless, and changeless as a mineral) is deadly: a consummate tedium. Had our ancestors collectively preferred to renounce worldly happiness rather than to pursue it, because this pursuit is inseparable from suffering, humanity would be ancient history preserved in dirt. It would be a fossil for no one to see ? no one except various critters that, unlike humans, would not have lost their will to live for good or ill and could be dubbed, for that reason, superior animals. This advocacy of a courageous life, however, ought to be qualified. In the unlikely event that one should be utterly incapacitated by an illness or an injury and overwhelmed with distress, without the slightest prospect of future recovery and contentment, the renunciation of one's goals and perhaps even of one's existence would be a reasonable option. It indeed appears that a stubborn attachment to the objects of one's desires and a stubborn effort to satisfy these desires would be painfully useless and hence more foolish than brave if this satisfaction is not in any way possible. Similarly, there are times when the bravest warriors have to admit defeat and rely on their honor to peacefully leave this world through their bleeding wounds. Supposing their final exit is excruciatingly prolonged, a fellow warrior may be right to expedite it at their request, since a sure but lingering and agonizing death seems terribly absurd. Bio: Laurent Grenier's writing career spans over twenty years. During this time he has broadened and deepened his worldview, by dint of much reflection and study, and in the end has crafted "A Reason for Living," his best work to date. Official web site: http://laurentgrenier.com/ARFL.html
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Lifes Like that
It is now 5 years since I passed out of college and started working. I
love working. I am not a workaholic but I love working. There is a lot
of pressure in the work we all do. This era is all about speed.
Everything around us moves at the speed of thought. And the wise
guys from the big B-Schools would tell you to be there at the right
time or else you'll loose the next big opportunity. All of us try to
search for the next big opportunity so that we are not left of out in
this race. We travel from place to place in search for that hidden
treasure, success, happiness or whatever one may like to call it.
I have closely interacted with hundreds of people in these years and
one of my favorites activity is studying people and human
behavior. In the beginning I used to get surprised (sometimes even
laugh) when I hear a new kid out of college and starting his life
say that he feels burnt out. But then if you look at it closely, the
kid is right. He is burnt out before he even starts because he is
always expected to perform beyond what his mind and body can take.
There is always this sense of urgency within all of us that usually
keeps us unhappy no matter what we achieve.
I too was in this rat race till my mother taught me the most important
lesson of my life and that is about being in the present and enjoying
every moment of it. Sadly though I had lost my mother by then. I still
remember that day on 18th December 2002 when I was thinking about my
mother in the back of my mind but yet I stayed in the office as
we had this requirement to get the ISDN up in our office. I was scared
that if the leased lines goes down we'll not have an alternative. So I
sat with the providers and did not listen to my heart. As a result by
the time I went to see my mom it was too late. I wish I had followed my
heart instead. That is when I realized that the ISDN
connection had no real significance in my life and yet I gave it an
unwanted priority.
Here are some rules I live by now which I hope would help all of you.
They say that it is best to learn from others mistakes. 6 basic rules
that we must all follow to be happy -
Live in the present -
Most good books on better living talk about being in the present. You cannot
afford to think and live in the past. Neither can you think about the
future all the time. You do not know what would happen in the future.
You do not have control over it. This does not mean that we should not
plan. It just means that we do not need to over stress ourselves
thinking about what would happen in the future.
Let me explain with a simple example. You want to go for a
vacation. You need to plan and buy the tickets in time. But it does not
mean that when you are in the train or aircraft you start running
inside it. You'll not reach any faster than all the other passengers
who are traveling with you.
However, do remember that you must learn from your past and improve
upon
it. The food from Pizza Hut is fattening. This means that it would
remain the same, unless they do some major changes to the way pizzas
are made. So saying that I cannot think about the past and I should
keep going over and over again to Pizza Hut does no make sense.
Also another important point is that you must learn to visualize about
the future. When I was kid our swimming coach used to talk a lot about
the power of visualization. He used to say that if you going for a
competition tomorrow, the previous night one should visualize the
entire event. It goes like this - I
feel light and energetic. The weather is great for swimming. I am going
to get the best place. My start is perfect. I have a perfect dive in
the water. The water is not too hot neither is it too cool. It is just
right for me. My breathing is perfect and my strokes are perfect and
coordinated. I am the winner...
Simulate the same situation when you are facing a client or an ISO
auditor.
Another aspect I'll like to point out here is that some people get into
the urgency because they feel insecure about the future. They think "If
I die my wife or family would face a
lot of problems... " In the process they start taking insurance
policies
left and right, try to buy a house etc.. In many cases they are not
able to keep up with all the liabilities and in that tension many do
really die. One must plan and have a secure future but
never over do anything. Take commitments only when it is possible to
live up to the commitment.
In short it all boils down to one thing. Be happy and live in the
moment. Enjoy every moment of it. Because the present will become the
past tomorrow and you need to cherish it then.
Never have any anger -
There
are times we are unhappy because we have anger against somebody. That
really does not help. All it does is make us sad. In no way does it
effect the person who has angered you. As in my case I was angry with
the providers for having given us a good for nothing ISDN modem. What I
lost in return was a lot more. It is not possible for us to not get
angry because the reason why one gets angry is when things do not work
the way we want it to. When people do not behave the way we want them
to. And this would continue to happen. The best we can do is focus on
something else in such situations. That makes us more relaxed. Also, be
grateful for what you have and do not think about what you do not have.
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inside us. "How could he do this to
me. I'll show him who I am".... Like I said a little while ago.
I am nobody. If somebody treats you bad it is his fault and there no
need for you to teach him a lesson. He needs to have self realization
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When I do talk about ego, I feel it is necessary to talk about self esteem
too..
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and dignity. But we must not allow somebody else to treat us as a door
mat. If you do not
like what the other person did to you. Cut off the relation or
remove the expectations.
Take pride in who you are
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